According to the app on my phone, I ovulated on Easter Sunday. I hope I released a tiny lil chocolate egg and my copper IUD produced coppery foil and wrapped it up nicely.
Adam’s sperm died on the T-shaped IUD and there’ll be no fucking resurrection.
[I don’t know what Easter is.]
No, this isn’t a perspective shot to make my orange juice look bigger. I will be needing this 1.75l at the very least if I ever want to finish my Ulysses essay.
happy easter, people
Very happy to be in a country right now that doesn’t celebrate Easter.
Yes. Good. Like.
Constant sex hair doesn’t even matter because Adam bought me this tshirt and I pretty much live in my Jam This shorts. Wearing such clothing makes me feel uber-energetic and I end up dancing round the apartment to HEALTH for hours in full view of the unfortunate multi-storey car park opposite. I am going to come home with the firmest hillocks for a butt I have ever known, I swear.